The Weather is Plátanos, and the Birds Go Whoooop

The trip to Panama began with me inventing a new kind of acrobatics, necessitated by the woman sitting next to me, who wouldn't get up to let me into the middle seat. She sat there, smacking her chewing gum, while I precariously dangled my carry-ons and one leg in the air, trying to find the best way to climb over her. I ended up handing all my stuff to the guy in the window, then sort of leaping over her, and hopping on one leg with my ass in her face. It was not dignified. On the other hand, it was more dignified than the blob continuing to masticate her stale gum while she was asleep. How is that even possible?

But other than that, the flights were fine, and I made it to Panama City on time. My bags did too. I managed to find the driver and get into my apartment, so it all went pretty smoothly. My apartment is ridiculously awesome. (And hopefully the minute I type that, a giant cockroach won't jump out and hiss at me.) I even have a bathtub. And an icepick. And a rice cooker. And an interesting vase with some rocks and twirly sticks in it. But the best part is the view:

And this brings me to the weather, which is absolutely bananas (hence the title of the post). Those two pictures were taken about ten minutes apart. All day, the weather gods have had multiple personality disorder. Sunny. Pouring. Sunny. Hellfire of Zeus. Sunny. Raining while sunny. Cloudy. Thankfully, it was still sunny when I went out earlier in search of food. I went to the only place open on Sunday, called El Rey, or The King, a massive supermarket. I had to ask directions from 6 people, because there are about 2 street signs in this neighborhood. I love the name of this supermarket though. "Turn right, and in twenty meters, you will see The King." So I bought food, including a whole pineapple. Pineapples are the armored fortresses of the fruit world, and I'm not sure how to attack mine. Maybe that's what the ice pick is for.

I've just been hanging out at the apartment since then, which shall henceforth be known as "The Gull." I watched Harry Potter 3 dubbed into Spanish. The phrase "No quiero vivir más con los Dursley" was very amusing to me. I don't know why. But I should actually unpack now instead of watching dubbed movies.

Oh, and before I forget, the birds here make a whoooooping noise. It kind of sounds like someone whistling to get your attention. I spent ten minutes looking around like a crazy person before I realized the sound was coming from creatures in the trees. Nothing says you're in the tropics like flying whooooooopers.